Personal post. Again

So. I have some hard news to tell everyone and I would really appreciate support, rather than rude comments.

Dan called off the engagement, and the relationship, after my last visit.

The news was devastating, and I'm not going to pretend to be okay, I took it pretty hard. (considering I wanted to marry the guy.)

But my support for him still stands, and I wish him all the happiness in the world.

Hope everyone is a-okay

-x-

One for all the mamas/mums/mas/mams/mummys.

So, in England, this Sunday is Mothering Sunday and I think that is one of the most worthiest of holidays. Don't get me wrong, Christmas, Easter, Fathers Day - all great. But who could honestly survive without their mum? (literally and metaphorically.) I know I wouldn't be the person I am today without my mum.

Everyone has that stage where you think "urgh mums are annoying they don't care" but as I have got older I have realised how amazing my mum actually is. She deals with a lot from her stroppy teen (and stroppy hubby too, ha sorry dad.) And I don't think mums are appreciated enough.

The thought of being a mother myself one day fills me with a lot of happiness. When I see people who have great relationships with their mum, like I do with mine, I think about the future and hope that my sons/daughters will love me and feel as close to me as I do to my mum.

But mothers day, isn't just about the amazing mums.

My nana is a mum too, after all. She gave my wonderful mum life, and not only that she was a second mum to me when my own had to return to work when I was only a few months old.

I love my mum, and my nana. And all mums, nanas, aunts, sisters, daughters, deserve some sort of recognition on Mothers Day because after all, most women will be a mother one day in their lives. (if they choose to of course.)

So this post, after all that ramble, is dedicated to the wonderful mums. Any of my followers that are mums. To the followers who love a mum, have lost a mum, will become a mum.

Lets show the much deserved appreciation for our Mums that they do not get enough of.

 

So, Mum - thanks. for being there always.

I love you.

The perks of dating a Transman.

So I think myself pretty lucky to be in the relationship I am in. Love is love, and I didn't purposely go out and find this guy, but I found him. And I wouldn't change him for the world.

 

I thought i'd make a humorous, almost cliché, list of perks to dating a transguy. And see if I can convert you single ladies to being open minded.

 

 

1. You don't get called overemotional (they are as blubbery as us sometimes! -sorry Dan-)
2. You can watch slushy films (The Vow is one of Dan's faves.)
3. They will NEVER say you're overreacting about period pains. (sorry Dan)
4. Sex. Epic. 'Nuff said.
5. They allow facemasks (and dan even let me paint his nails once. HA.)
6. They do feeelings
7. Kind of like a gay best friend but without the fancying of men and with the perks of being epic boyfriends/fiancés. (they do however moan about us taking ages to get ready... and some transguys are gay so.. doesn't apply to all..)

And there are plenty of the regular "bioguy" perks too, but I love my transman. And I wouldn't swap him for Johnny Depp if someone offered. (Seriously.) He deals with me being an emotional ranty moany moody stroppy stressed out slushy blubbering cow, and anyone does that deserves knighthood let alone a dedicated blog post.

Overall, I love my smurf.

A Sadness Runs Through Him. (personal post - please read with an open mind)

This post is personal, for myself and the person involved. I have permission to write the things I'm about to - but I would plead you to use an open mind when reading this.

Daniel - my wonderful, lovely love-bug of a fiancé is transgender. Some of you may understand this term. Some of you may not.

In short, he was born female.

 

 

He is wonderful. He is my man. And he is most certainly a HE. (And if anyone wishes to argue against that with me I shall talk the hid legs off a donkey and keep going until the cows come home.)

 

 

He is pre-testosterone (meaning he is currently not taking male hormones) and pre-surgery (that's self explanatory, right?) and today we experienced a tough time.

 

He tells me pretty much everything, we are agony aunts (and uncles) to each other and I love that part of our relationship. Regardless of the 341 miles between us we still offer comfort and consolidation to each other. Again there was the usual topic of discomfort; his parents. They are unaccepting, and very blunt about it. And the tension returned again to them thinking the wrong thoughts for parents.

 

It upsets me terribly to see that his own parents do not wish to offer support for him. (to me, I would want my child to be happy regardless of the pain and struggle it may cause me.) and it is a usual topic of annoyance for Dan. (And for me)

 

 

So, rant over. The purpose of this post was to raise awareness, and as Dan is open to questions i thought i'd leave it open to any of you guys who would like to ask questions. Just leave them in the comments and i'll get back to you ASAP with answers!

 



Tattoos, visitors and Mrs Dixon to be.

Ahhhh half term is coming swiftly to an end *sob* which means a rather stressful panic of getting back into the habit of college *double sob* and I apologise for my lacking of posts but inspiration has been a mystery to me lately.

I thought i'd do a bit of an update for you lovlies.

Firstly, the oldest of updates - I have my first tattoo! And I could not be happier with it. I got my first tattoo on the 4th January (so yes, it is a rather late update! but I have become so used to it I sometimes forget it is there.) Recently, I have realised how much being yourself matters. Throughout senior school (high school, secondary school) I had many phases of changing myself to please others - and I hated every minute of it. I have finally found myself, and I am comfortable being myself. I enjoy being me! Okay so everyone has flaws, or things they don't like about themselves. But sometimes, I get up in the morning, I see myself in the mirror and I think "you know what - maybe you didn't fall from the ugly tree after all". Now don't get me wrong, I have those self-loathing days where my hair won't go right and I feel fat and hideous, but who doesn't have those days? (No, really who doesn't? Let me hit them.) But those days make me appreciate the days where I feel good about myself even more.

Anyway my tattoo is sort of a permanent reminder to myself to be who I want to be when I want to be.

'Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind' -Dr Seus
I'm not entirely sure which aspect (I suppose you could say) of Dr Seus that this lovely thing comes from, but I stumbled across it on Instagram (Follow me if you like! @faye_ew) a long time before I took the plunge to get my tattoo and it just stuck. I repeated it in my head for ages, planned it for ages, and then finally I was set. My mind didn't change over the months that I was thinking about it, and so I knew it would be my first tattoo.
The first 'B' of the tattoo (Be who you are etc) has a red and white striped hat sitting atop it. Dr Seus, to me, instantly brings images of the cat in the hat to my mind, and so as an image reminder of the source, I had the little hat added. I had it done in my local tattoo shop, and I am sure to go back when I can afford my next piece of ink (Yes tattoos are pricey, but you pay for the quality and service)


My tattoo! (sorry for poor quality)

A newer update - my long distance relationship is going amazingly, and although it is hard work (and expensive) i can say I have never felt love like this. He visited the past week (half term for us students) and we had the most amazing time. We took trips into London, we share such similar interests when it comes to travelling and culture. He was amazed by the "efficiency of London transport" (oh if only he live here aha) and.. for the most recent and possibly shocking update..

HE PROPOSED!

I know to some people this may seem soon (i'd appreciate you keeping that to yourself) but to us; it feels right. And above all it feels amazing. I get butterflies just thinking about spending my life with him. My heart melts at the idea of spending the rest of my life with this guy, and to be quite plain it brings tears of joy to my eyes.
Wedding bells are not for years yet, as I have a passion for my studies and career, and neither of us have the resources to afford a wedding, or to live together etc but it is the next step towards our future and i cannot wait.

Ahh i'm all gooey inside just thinking about it (Oh shush i'm in love deal with it.)

A close-up of my ring

When I visited his over New Years

Outside Buckingham Palace - in the words of Daniel "We went to see Lizzie for a brew like" (he is a northerner - and I have had a passionate love for accents for as long as I can remember ;].)

I cannot wait to be Mrs Dixon, and I leave you with this happy smushy post.

-x-

A bad blogger with new hair.

You may tell me off later; I promise.

I know I know I've been neglecting you again, i'm sorry. Still love me?

The whirlwind life (cough.) that I lead has been keeping me shockingly busy.

Trips to plan, exams to sit, a new job; the real world calls.

But I am back! (To let you know.. I can really shake 'em down..) And accompanied by a bob. Yes, that's right. A bob.

Ta-da! (Excuse the IG quality.)

Now to me my hair wasn't very long to begin with. But looking back at old photos, my hair was reaching my bra strap, and now - it just skims my shoulders.

It may be a big change to some, but for me the practicality has improved immensely.

I am also working on a few craft projects, cute fox cushions as well as a knitting project. (just a simple scarf) I am planning to take up crocheting also (as apparently this is easier than knitting. Hmm, a likely story..) and shall update you when I get onto that

Crafts, for me, are big skills to have. Whether it is sewing, knitting, cross stitch; the list is endless. I know that to some women, the idea of being able to sew is that original social stereotype of a woman, but find me one girl out there who doesn't regret sewing that button back on when she had the chance..

Anyway, the real world is calling again. Work; here I come.


Hope everyone of you stays warm and safe in this snow (If you have any)

Ta-ra
-x-x-

We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

A very, very quick post, and update, as I am currently pausing the packing for my New Years trip, to wish you all a wonderful Christmas and New Year.

In a previous post I briefly mentioned I had recently started a long distance relationship, well I am very chuffed to say I was invited to stay with him and his family over New Years, meaning I have a 6 day suitcase to pack (Sob.)

I shall go picture crazy while there, and give you all the gossip once I am soundly back in the dull Essex

 

Toodles

-x-